i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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