Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
