Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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