I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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