Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
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