He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
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