we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Just cropdusted the office
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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