Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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