Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
