I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
