Fuck appropriateness.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
