Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I will pee on everything he values.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Randomize
