spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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