pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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