whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
