I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
