Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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