So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
that's an acceptable place to lick
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Randomize
