Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
