How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
