Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
