I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
