I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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