I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
