Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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