oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
