Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize