I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
