none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
do herpes really smell.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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