in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
