Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
That's when you crack a 10am beer
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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