I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Randomize
