id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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