dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize
