The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
