Dual....:-)
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
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