Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
