If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
