So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Randomize