I heard we made out
I wish I could punch you in the face.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I just had sex on a roof
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
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