So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
