if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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