And the cops told us we were all naked.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize
