did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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