That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Randomize
