She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Randomize
