I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
