Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
