yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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