he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
